Friday, August 8, 2014

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles

Rated PG-13 / 1 hr 41 min / Action - Adventure - Comedy

What's it about?

April Oneil is struggling in her job with News Channel 6. Her bosses want her to spend her time reporting on things like kitten fasion shows and new workout trends based on jumping on a trampoline. I mean who doesn't like watching Megan Fox jumping on a trampoline? Meanwhile.. The Foot Clan is terrorizing the streets, and April is chasing them because she wants to be taken seriously as a journalist. She sees a robbery in progress by the clan that is broken up by a vigilante or group of vigilantes who just happen to be turtles and ninjas and teenagers. The problem is that no one believes her, except for the bad guys.

You will like it if...

You are a huge TMNT fan that will like anything TMNT related even if Michael Bay is involved. I will say that the actual turtles aren't that bad as far as the special effects and the delivery of the lines. The problems infecting this movie are all the same ones that are in all Michael Bay movies. Even though he is listed as a producer rather than the director, you can see the same issues that have ruined the Transformers movies. The camera zooms in way too close in many of the fight scenes to the point where you have no clue what is going on. Just like in Transformers they like to zoom in way too close on the computer animated characters like "Look how gewd mah sechul effex R!", and the quoted text reads like some of the dialogue in the movie. It's so painful in parts that you can tell Will Arnett is questioning his decision to take his role in the movie. He tries to mumble the lines quickly to get through the terribleness. I'll give you an example of a line in this movie. "Drain every ounce of blood from their veins, even if it kills them." Right... Shredder himself looks like he would be more at home in the Transformers movies than in this one. The movie overall isn't as terrible as I was expecting, but it's not much better than your standard Michael Bay soul depleting experience.

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