Wednesday, July 1, 2015

Terminator Genisys


Rated PG-13 / 2 hr 5 min / Action - Adventure - SciFi

What is it about?

The war against the machines is ending, but there is another mission that is somehow more important than taking Skynet down. John Connor has to make sure that Kyle Reese goes back in time to invent Reese's Pieces. Who wants to live in a world without those? When Kyle goes back in time there is something wrong. One of the liquid metal terminators made the trip over from Terminator 2 to say hi. Sarah Connor crashes into a building with a Brinks truck and says "Come with me if you want to give me a tongue bath" or whatever it is they always say in these Terminator movies. Then they try to stop Skynet from ever becoming a thing to prevent the One Direction Apocalypse. The previous Terminator films have warned us about One Direction.

You will like it if...

You like action movies featuring homicidal robots from the future with nonsensical scripts. Just like Terminator Salvation the script is a complete mess for most of it. Any time you begin to explore alternate timelines within a complicated time travel tale, things tend to get a bit murky unless you pay very close attention to detail. The people writing this script didn't bother. For every minor detail they get right there is a major plot point they get horribly wrong. The entire dialogue between John Connor, Sarah Connor, and Kyle Reese once they all make it to 2017 ends up being a massive blob of "What the crap is this??" It's better to not think about it too much and enjoy all of the action scenes. The special effects are top notch and the explosions are pretty. The actors do a good job with what they are given, but the script is a giant mess. Like the tentacle monster in hentai, it is best not to question it. The movie still manages to entertain as long as you don't get a tropical disease from getting too close to the script. I don't want to give away the ending, but it's one of the biggest piles of wtf in the script.

Next Week

Minions, Self/less, or The Gallows
Vote for your choice in the comments!

No comments: